i’m tired. . . really tired. my near month and a half here has been exhausting. the theatre classes have finished so i have some free space in my time to coordinate for myself. i can clean, organize, become familiar with my surroundings. . . all without students swarming at my heels. well, they are still around, but not as much, and i’m enjoying the breather. though i’m made nervous by my upcoming schedule. the organizing that MUST happen is going to be a handful. . . and i worry that i won’t have enough time or help.
i think that if i were a superstitious person, i wouldn’t be here now. i’m on my third attempt at housing. . . and here’s hoping that three is indeed the charm. i’m sick of hotel living, and so is my wallet. i moved into an extended stay hotel when i first got here, and stayed a month. but it’s pricey. . . so i moved to another place out in glendale last week. it had better cable. . . and that’s about it. it was 20 miles away, smaller room, slightly creepier, fewer creature comforts. . . i left it sunday, with the thought that i was meeting a to-be roommate with which i had a fantastic interview. i called to solidify, and was told that he needed more time to think about it. so i wasn’t homeless, but i was hotel-less. i had my car-full of items i’ve been living from. . . and took off for school for a bit. i ended up right back at the extended stay place i left. giving myself one more week to find a place. i had another interview today, and the girls are slightly desperate, the house is gorgeous, the conversation wasn’t quite as indepth as the last. . . but i think i’m willing to work with it. and like last sunday, i will pack my car and wait to see if i can move in. just long enough to sleep a few nights and take off back to ny for a break.
i feel like the world is working against me, and yet, no one else seems surprised by it. i get constant encouragement from both students and co-workers, ‘this is a tough year’ . . . ‘it takes a while to get used to this place’ . . . ‘don’t worry, it gets easier.’ and so on. and yet, i don’t actually see where it gets easier. the next semester is going to be painfully busy. . . something’s gotta give. even with the exhausting nature of it, i have trouble sleeping at night. i’ve gone through some horrible dreams. . . . theatrical mechanics crushing people, a long bit about a serial killer (well, the good hotel has bad cable, but one good channel-showtime, with the great new show ‘dexter.’ i LOVE this show, and i’m hooked- but it’s about serial killers, so maybe there’s my muse), and saddam hussein somehow made the mix.
i’m eating well. . . at least i think i am. my digestion’s been funny though. my friend who is now in her 5th month of living abroad in india would say i have the ‘loosies.’ at least i think that’s the term she used. everyone around me has come down with some kind of food poisoning. . . but i’m thinking it was a virus, since so many have had it, and yet, we all haven’t been eating the same food. lucky me. . . i seem to have it too. yeah, i know, just what everyone wants to read about. my bowel movements. . . what excitement. moving on. . . hehe. . . moving.
i miss my friends in santa fe. i got calls this past weekend about how to set up the christmas party. everyone had joked about how they wanted to ask me back to watch over the christmas party, and i liked the thought of that, but being here now, i know it would’ve been impossible to schedule. i don’t want to think i made the wrong decision coming here. i really like the idea and challenge of cleaning this place up, and making it a functioning, efficient beast. but i really wonder if it’s in my ability. dad wanted me to set parameters that i could follow if i felt too overwhelmed. . . to give me a clear path of when enough is enough. i still don’t have those. i had this feeling, bitter as it was, that if any of my good equipment was stolen, i would walk. my expensive and well used and loved amp clamp is missing. i’m pissed, but i’m still here. i’m giving it time to ‘show up.’
to add to the lame things in life, every single music listening device i have is lopsided. my headphones, my car stereo, and my little travel speakers for my ipod are all broken on one side. i replaced the headphones, the travel speakers aren’t a large issue. . . but my car stereo. . . errrrr. christ on a cracker!
losing the possibility of an apartment twice has been rough. i keep feeling like i have no grounding. i want somewhere to hang my proverbial hat. . . and my real hat. it’s been defeating. i’m not the most festive person around, but i did plan to make the traditional rumballs this year. i had planned that i would do that in my new apartment, it would be one of those, ‘here i am, . . . home’ /christening kind of things. and when i lost the more recent apartment, i lost the momentum to make the rumballs. and then monday hit. . . and i just decided i would make them in the hotel. and not only make them, but make a double dose. one for here, and one to send back to santa fe.
and i did. there may have been further incentive in a short jaunt for retail therapy. after all, i wasn’t going to dig through my storage unit for a spoon, mixing bowl, and measuring cup. . . oh no!. . . this required a trip to target. now, usually i use a roommate’s food processor or blender to pulverize the vanilla wafers to crumbs. this was one item that i wouldn’t buy just for the occasion, and the action was my biggest challenge. i figured i’d beat the wafers inside a plastic baggy with a large metal spoon. five minutes after trying that i realized it wouldn’t work. necessity is the mother of invention. . . and i shortly figured that i could crush the vanilla wafers by stepping on them. so there i was, in my hotel room, smashing vanilla wafers in a plastic baggy with my feet. calm down, it was totally sanitary! my feet never touched the food!. . . and the rumballs turned out well. they seemed to raise the spirits and blood alcohol level of my new coworkers sufficiently, and two tins are currently in route to santa fe. hope they get there soon.
oh, and i saw sissy spacek drop kid off at college.
i really hope to move into an apartment this sunday. i want the chance to change my profile on all my myspace type places so that they no longer say ‘santa fe’. . . i don’t want to have to explain why i don’t have a place to people i may run into while i’m home over the break. i just want to say, yeah, i moved to valencia. no lengthy explanation to follow. i want to have a week without apartment hunting. . . perhaps a week of present shopping instead? you know, a place to store my plants while i pack and leave for ny. especially the christmas cactus which began blooming a month ago.
i think that if i were a superstitious person, i wouldn’t be here now. i’m on my third attempt at housing. . . and here’s hoping that three is indeed the charm. i’m sick of hotel living, and so is my wallet. i moved into an extended stay hotel when i first got here, and stayed a month. but it’s pricey. . . so i moved to another place out in glendale last week. it had better cable. . . and that’s about it. it was 20 miles away, smaller room, slightly creepier, fewer creature comforts. . . i left it sunday, with the thought that i was meeting a to-be roommate with which i had a fantastic interview. i called to solidify, and was told that he needed more time to think about it. so i wasn’t homeless, but i was hotel-less. i had my car-full of items i’ve been living from. . . and took off for school for a bit. i ended up right back at the extended stay place i left. giving myself one more week to find a place. i had another interview today, and the girls are slightly desperate, the house is gorgeous, the conversation wasn’t quite as indepth as the last. . . but i think i’m willing to work with it. and like last sunday, i will pack my car and wait to see if i can move in. just long enough to sleep a few nights and take off back to ny for a break.
i feel like the world is working against me, and yet, no one else seems surprised by it. i get constant encouragement from both students and co-workers, ‘this is a tough year’ . . . ‘it takes a while to get used to this place’ . . . ‘don’t worry, it gets easier.’ and so on. and yet, i don’t actually see where it gets easier. the next semester is going to be painfully busy. . . something’s gotta give. even with the exhausting nature of it, i have trouble sleeping at night. i’ve gone through some horrible dreams. . . . theatrical mechanics crushing people, a long bit about a serial killer (well, the good hotel has bad cable, but one good channel-showtime, with the great new show ‘dexter.’ i LOVE this show, and i’m hooked- but it’s about serial killers, so maybe there’s my muse), and saddam hussein somehow made the mix.
i’m eating well. . . at least i think i am. my digestion’s been funny though. my friend who is now in her 5th month of living abroad in india would say i have the ‘loosies.’ at least i think that’s the term she used. everyone around me has come down with some kind of food poisoning. . . but i’m thinking it was a virus, since so many have had it, and yet, we all haven’t been eating the same food. lucky me. . . i seem to have it too. yeah, i know, just what everyone wants to read about. my bowel movements. . . what excitement. moving on. . . hehe. . . moving.
i miss my friends in santa fe. i got calls this past weekend about how to set up the christmas party. everyone had joked about how they wanted to ask me back to watch over the christmas party, and i liked the thought of that, but being here now, i know it would’ve been impossible to schedule. i don’t want to think i made the wrong decision coming here. i really like the idea and challenge of cleaning this place up, and making it a functioning, efficient beast. but i really wonder if it’s in my ability. dad wanted me to set parameters that i could follow if i felt too overwhelmed. . . to give me a clear path of when enough is enough. i still don’t have those. i had this feeling, bitter as it was, that if any of my good equipment was stolen, i would walk. my expensive and well used and loved amp clamp is missing. i’m pissed, but i’m still here. i’m giving it time to ‘show up.’
to add to the lame things in life, every single music listening device i have is lopsided. my headphones, my car stereo, and my little travel speakers for my ipod are all broken on one side. i replaced the headphones, the travel speakers aren’t a large issue. . . but my car stereo. . . errrrr. christ on a cracker!
losing the possibility of an apartment twice has been rough. i keep feeling like i have no grounding. i want somewhere to hang my proverbial hat. . . and my real hat. it’s been defeating. i’m not the most festive person around, but i did plan to make the traditional rumballs this year. i had planned that i would do that in my new apartment, it would be one of those, ‘here i am, . . . home’ /christening kind of things. and when i lost the more recent apartment, i lost the momentum to make the rumballs. and then monday hit. . . and i just decided i would make them in the hotel. and not only make them, but make a double dose. one for here, and one to send back to santa fe.
and i did. there may have been further incentive in a short jaunt for retail therapy. after all, i wasn’t going to dig through my storage unit for a spoon, mixing bowl, and measuring cup. . . oh no!. . . this required a trip to target. now, usually i use a roommate’s food processor or blender to pulverize the vanilla wafers to crumbs. this was one item that i wouldn’t buy just for the occasion, and the action was my biggest challenge. i figured i’d beat the wafers inside a plastic baggy with a large metal spoon. five minutes after trying that i realized it wouldn’t work. necessity is the mother of invention. . . and i shortly figured that i could crush the vanilla wafers by stepping on them. so there i was, in my hotel room, smashing vanilla wafers in a plastic baggy with my feet. calm down, it was totally sanitary! my feet never touched the food!. . . and the rumballs turned out well. they seemed to raise the spirits and blood alcohol level of my new coworkers sufficiently, and two tins are currently in route to santa fe. hope they get there soon.
oh, and i saw sissy spacek drop kid off at college.
i really hope to move into an apartment this sunday. i want the chance to change my profile on all my myspace type places so that they no longer say ‘santa fe’. . . i don’t want to have to explain why i don’t have a place to people i may run into while i’m home over the break. i just want to say, yeah, i moved to valencia. no lengthy explanation to follow. i want to have a week without apartment hunting. . . perhaps a week of present shopping instead? you know, a place to store my plants while i pack and leave for ny. especially the christmas cactus which began blooming a month ago.
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