being at home for the past few days has afforded me the ability to sleep in. . . . till 11 or so almost every day. one thing that i've really noticed about sleeping in is that my dreams get more and more quirky the more i sleep in. if you take to believing that sleep involves some sort of recouperative brain actions. . . like the sorting of memories from short to longterm memory storage and such. . . then perhaps, after doing all the normal daily duties, my synapses hold a short meeting and decide, 'hey, it's time for some fun. . . exactly how bizzare can we make these dreams for her?'. . .

this morning's dream took place in a target store after hours. kate baker had decided ther were a few things she wanted to shoplift, and i was gonna help her. however, there were a lot of employees working after hours, restocking and cleaning and such. . . .and for some reason a lot fo the employees were small children. so whenever i tried to duck and hide, it was always in their view. . . i was scared that they would give away my hiding place, but for some reason they couldn't speak an understandable english, and all the older employees paid them little attention. one child employee did manage to take away the one bad of bits that i had grabbed, which included a shirt kate wanted for her sister. it had some brand across the chest, which would disappear and reveal the word 'BREASTS' in huge letters when warmed, like hyper color. anyway, after hiding for a while, kate found me, and we managed to run around and grab the rest of what she was looking for, and took off through and unguarded passageway. outside, it was daylight, and there were tons of people around. honestly, most of them looked like they were from the movie Grease. . . . and they gave us a knowing look after seeing our bags.

but. . . i think two mornings ago was even more bizarre. i guess i was getting dressed or something. i looked down and noticed that my left boob had moved significatly toward the center of my chest, and my right boob had started to move slightly closer to my right side. and to my pure disgust, there was a small boob forming symmetrically to my right one. oh and a huge puss nodule near my left shoulder, which of course i popped and let ooze for a good half hour. immediately i wondered how a plastic surgeon would be able to handle replacing my boobs. . . ( not at all considering how having three boobs could make me really popular on the freak circuit. . . or 'girls gone wild'. . . . .HA) sometime after all that i went to work and had to do a shopping run. the home depot and office depot had merged, and they were one big store. there was two girls who worked there. they had started dating one another a while ago, and i'd gotten really used to seeing them and hearing about the latest bit of their relationship. . . (run like a mom and pop store in a way. . . or should i say, a mom and mom store) anyway, they let me know that they were doing to their perspective homes for holiday, but then they were going to move away together. i wished them luck, and realized it would suck to have to get used to new people owning that store.

and there you have it. exactly what portion of my brain was in charge of conjuring up any of those ideas and images? maybe i shouldn't sleep in so late. . .

it's christmas eve. . . though it feel little like it. i'm nearly finished cleaning my room. i think i started about a month ago. all i ahve left to do is some laundry and packing. i'll leave for home tomorrow around noon. i think my room will be in pretty good order by then. the floor is so mess free i'll be able to run a vacuum recklessly around without losing small treasures. i have some music stuff to do. . . to prepare my ipod for travel. i have a 4 hour layover in chicago. . . maybe i'll bring a dvd as well!

i've been thinking about how amazing my immune system is. . . like maybe all the vitamins i take are really working, or the acupuncture is (though i haven't been for a treatment in 3 weeks). . . jared has been sick for a week, and i've been in wonder that i haven't caught it yet. . . but oh the hubris. after working extra long hours in a very cold theatre basement. . . and just in time for me to take some time off. . . i've come down with a killer head cold. so not only will i be flying sick, but i'll get to battle both it and cat allergies at home- mom and dad. . . hope you've stocked up well on soft kleenex! apparently if i constantly blow my nose. . . my eyes don't water. yipee

jared's working at borders, i've been cleaning. . . and i did shop a little. but i'd hoped that if i mostly rested today, that this bug would move out of me. i don't wanna be sick when there's important work to do. . . which has been quite often lately. but there was plenty of time about a month ago for me to take a sick day and what not! but nooooooooo. . . it's gotta come on when i finally get to have some 'me' time. . . .dammit!

anyway. . . till later, probably while i'm in sub zero temperatures in northern ny. . . .happy holidays!

well. . . i've hit an all new low. before last night i had made peace with the fact that i've fallen asleep while watching south park, and while watching my much beloved daily show with jon stewart. however last night was rather unforgivable, i fell asleep while watching a new eddie izzard video. what has BECOME OF ME?!

what i want to do. . .

i want to. . .

work out, eat, sleep, write, call, talk, play, sleep, read, watch lots of tv, cook, sleep, add pictures to this blog, finish christmas crap, relax, clean, sleep. . . . but i can't seem to get off my ass at the moment. i'm kind of impressed that i'm able to write almost coherent sentences at all. . . .

i want to call in sick. . but i know i won't. . . too many things to do to get ready for next week. maybe, i will take a day if i feel like i'm ready for the upcoming meeting. . . . i need a day of nothing. . . and there aren't any openings coming up. arg.hmm. . . maybe wednesday.

******************************************************************************
what i did. . . .

thursday. . . cleaned out scene shop with the carpenters so we can start decorating for the christmas party. passed around amny a favored rum ball. attended the annual staff christmas dinner. good food, and a really good midori sour.

friday. . . went into work (kinda headachy- from one cocktail?!) for longer than a full day to help set up the donor christmas party. . . (we usually don't work fridays because we work 10 hour days monday thru thursday) and i honestly can't remember if i did anything interesting that evening. . . i think i was too tired.

saturday. . . went into work for a couple of hours to make sure the party was really set to go. went home, showered, made homemade egg nog- with pumpkin flavoring and lots of rum. called a friend to see if she wanted to go to the espanola light parade with me. . . she was too tired. i stopped by another friend's place to stop off some books, a video game, and egg nog- she's recently out of the hospital and kinda bed ridden. drove to espanola for the light parade. . lots of fun. . . . but not as much fun as with a couple other people. came home and fell asleep watching south park. . . . disgusting. . . . 12:30 am. . . unbelievable.

sunday. . . slept in till 12:15 pm. . . . again, disgusting. . . but damn i was tired. cleaned kitchen a little, went to breakfast (at 2pm) with jared, ran into cassie, planned evening at plaza. did some christmas shopping, searched for perfect small desk to help organize my newly cleaned room, but was sadly disappointed by my choices, which means there will be a large clump of stuff waiting for a desk for a little while longer. . cluttering my otherwise clean room. stopped home for an hour, then off to the plaza for some holiday festivities. . . had late dinner at oasis, and home too late to do laundry (which is drying as i write) barely made it into the shower. . . just too lethargic.

monday. . . take down all holiday crap in the shop and restore all tools so we can continue to work on scenery for this upcoming season. sat on ass most of the evening. . . not even watching tv, doing laundry, and writing very uninspiredly.

do you think this was on purpose. . . . or just some poor dyslexic without a decent spell check?

ok. . . so i have 'what not to wear' on in the background. they just gave this woman a $50 grand shopping spree in paris. kind of amazing. . . . and the show is kinda fun to watch. . . but i'm thinking. . . $50 grand. . . paris. me, with that money and plane ticket. . . i could set up a nice little apartment and live fairly richly for a year. . . possibly longer. and this woman will spend it. . . on clothes, in less than 3 days time. sadly incredible. . . . incredibly sad?

hallmark needs to expand. . . . .


i went into a hallmark yesterday afternoon. . . i usually like the card selection in target, but i thought hallmark would have something nice and i didn't plan to trek all the way to target out here. the hallmark was kinda small, and had a high worker to low customer ratio. the 'get well' area was the farthest from the door. . . so it took me a small bit to actually find it. and by the time i started looking through it, i was already offered help from two different people.

there were the religious cards, and the sappy inspirational cards, i was just looking for a well wishes and slightly funny/ get well and cute type thing. . . i was sadly disappointed. and twice more, i was offered help. . . i graciously declined, but what i really wanted to say was, 'why yes, could you point me out a proper card for a co-worker/friend having a partial hysterectomy, another coworker/friend having surgery to remove a cyst from her ovary, and a third card for my aunt who recently decided to split from my uncle?'

there was a serious operation card or two. . . but they were a little too sappy. so, in the end i chose two slightly cute and cheesy 'get well' cards, and a 'happy new home' card (trying to find the positive in a separation.) where are the sweet funny distraction cards with half naked men, promises of many alcoholic libations, and silly girls' nights out. these people are dealing with serious issues. . . do we have to stroke the pain, fear, and depression? it doesn't have to be a, 'congratulations on losing 'x' amount of pounds! who knew that a uterus/ cyst/ spouse weighed so much?!' kinda card. . . just something to slightly distact and amuse. . . oh well. . . .