a new obsession

a new obsession of mine lately is penn and teller. I’ve seen one of their vegas shows live.- really fantastic. . . funny, thought provoking, sometimes dark and twisted. . . and simply amazing. i’ve rented a handful of their showtime programs, ‘bullshit,’ i’ve scoured for video of their appearances on other shows. . . and i bought a book of their fun tricks to play on friends, which i doubt i will ever have the chance/ talent to pull over on anyone. i have a fond distance memory of wanting to see them while they were in boston, but i probably couldn’t afford it at the time. i was standing on the corner of tremont and boylston waiting to cross when i finally looked up from the ground, and there, standing next to me was a giant of a man (especially compared to my ‘just over 5 foot’ stature). . . penn, also waiting to cross the street. it wasn’t till years later that i got a chance to see them live.

they share some pretty strong beliefs. . . though i doubt they are any stronger than anyone elses. . perhaps i’m just not used to hearing such a different side of the story told so fiercely, boldly, and, well. . eloquently. i’ve found that i’m very open to their argument, perhaps not taking it as a whole, but taking it in nonetheless. i just started listening to a newer radio show that penn has on free fm. . . i’m amazed by the intelligent grasp he uses while tossing ideas and stories about without ever sounding above human error. well. . . just thought i’d share. . .

this is penn’s essay for npr’s, ‘this i believe.’ the whole thing is is great. . . but i bolded in one section that really strikes me.



I believe that there is no God. I'm beyond atheism. Atheism is not believing in God. Not believing in God is easy -- you can't prove a negative, so there's no work to do. You can't prove that there isn't an elephant inside the trunk of my car. You sure? How about now? Maybe he was just hiding before. Check again. Did I mention that my personal heartfelt definition of the word "elephant" includes mystery, order, goodness, love and a spare tire?
So, anyone with a love for truth outside of herself has to start with no belief in God and then look for evidence of God. She needs to search for some objective evidence of a supernatural power. All the people I write e-mails to often are still stuck at this searching stage. The atheism part is easy.
But, this "This I Believe" thing seems to demand something more personal, some leap of faith that helps one see life's big picture, some rules to live by. So, I'm saying, "This I believe: I believe there is no God."
Having taken that step, it informs every moment of my life. I'm not greedy. I have love, blue skies, rainbows and Hallmark cards, and that has to be enough. It has to be enough, but it's everything in the world and everything in the world is plenty for me. It seems just rude to beg the invisible for more. Just the love of my family that raised me and the family I'm raising now is enough that I don't need heaven. I won the huge genetic lottery and I get joy every day.
Believing there's no God means I can't really be forgiven except by kindness and faulty memories. That's good; it makes me want to be more thoughtful. I have to try to treat people right the first time around.
Believing there's no God stops me from being solipsistic. I can read ideas from all different people from all different cultures. Without God, we can agree on reality, and I can keep learning where I'm wrong. We can all keep adjusting, so we can really communicate. I don't travel in circles where people say, "I have faith, I believe this in my heart and nothing you can say or do can shake my faith." That's just a long-winded religious way to say, "shut up," or another two words that the FCC likes less. But all obscenity is less insulting than, "How I was brought up and my imaginary friend means more to me than anything you can ever say or do." So, believing there is no God lets me be proven wrong and that's always fun. It means I'm learning something.
Believing there is no God means the suffering I've seen in my family, and indeed all the suffering in the world, isn't caused by an omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent force that isn't bothered to help or is just testing us, but rather something we all may be able to help others with in the future. No God means the possibility of less suffering in the future.
Believing there is no God gives me more room for belief in family, people, love, truth, beauty, sex, Jell-O and all the other things I can prove and that make this life the best life I will ever have.

canyon of thought

i’m thinking that i’ll actually post this once i get home, unless i make a pit stop somewhere with wi-fi. you see, as i’m writing this i have no internet connect. . . my cell phone is digitally roaming, so i turned it off two days ago. i’ll turn it back on sometime tomorrow (monday) while i’m driving.

this is my 5th time to the grand canyon. i have an aunt and uncle who used to live directly in the village. i visited them with my family twice. the second time to see their wedding on the north rim. the first two visits were only about 6 months apart. yeah. . . in fact it was over easter the first time. i remember swapping decorated eggs with a woman in our train car. and the trip for their wedding was in september i think. well, definitely within a year.

my third time through i was traveling with two friends, james and val, on our way to san francisco after college. i fought them a bit to get here. they weren’t feeling great about paying extra in mileage on our moving van, and the canyon was a bit out of the way. we’d already driven way far to get to ‘carhenge’. . . i threw a little ‘erika rational’ and pouty-ness their way-. . . and we ended up spending the day in the area. my uncle met up with us (i can’t remember if my aunt was there too, or if she was working) and bought us some lunch. he shared a story about how he was on his way to san francisco when he ended up at the canyon. he needed to make some money in order to continue his journey, and that was 20 years ago. i think that story might have sparked each of us a bit, to get back on the road. each of us had invested into apartments already. . . besides, the next stop was vegas.

the 4th time was also within 6 months of its previous visit. . . in fact, just about 4 months. san francisco wasn’t really working out for me, and my friend nana flew out to help me drive to my next job in virginia. she also didn’t want to take the time to stop at the canyon. we were on a much more strict schedule. (james, val and i took 9 days to get cross country, seeing a bunch of different sites, nana and i only had three days.) nana’s rational was that she only wanted to go if she had the time to spend a couple of days there. i have an understanding for this rational. . . it is a place that deserves a certain reverence and quality of time. however, if you’ve never seen it, as nana hadn’t, even a couple of hours, hell- even a proper few minutes is worth it. so. . . nana was more stubborn then james and val, so i had to work around her. it was my shift to drive, and nana had fallen asleep. i drove us into the park and got about 10 minutes from a viewing point before i woke her and gave her the ‘option’ of turning back. we probably didn’t stay much more than an hour. i remember taking a picture of her creating an ‘eye’ shadow by placing her hands over her head and her elbows away from her body in the ‘watchtower.’ i can’t totally remember if she was thankful or not, but i don’t remember her giving me a hard time about it, so i guess it didn’t go over too badly.

so here i am, a 5th time. i’ve come alone. i really just wanted the quiet and space. i don’t remember staying in the park before- though we must’ve stayed not too far away when i was here with my family. and now, i’m only a quarter mile walk from the rim. it’s chilly and awesome, in the true meaning of the word- as my earth science teacher/ godmother would say, oh, and eddie izzard.

i guess other people might view this ‘vacation’ as sad, or dramatic. yeah, i’m turning 30. truthfully, i would’ve come any other time. . . quiet, solitude, and a pretty view is how i’d like to spend 1/2 of my time. . . but having a birthday seems to give allowance to take a vacation day off work, and get part of the trip as a gift :) thanks mom and dad!

and i’d be lying if i said i didn’t hope to get anything from it. isn’t this the part in the movie where the girl bumps into the man of her dreams? or is it the part where her true purpose in life is revealed? (of course! i can’t wait to release my inner park ranger!) or maybe it’s the part where she gets chased out of her room by a rabid squirrel while in her skimpy pj’s, and a hilarious sequence of barely believable events ensues. guess it depends on the genre. so what really happened?

i got up late and packed,- just like the commercial. . . i OVER-packed, and then under utilized, i ran some errands, and didn’t leave till about 12:30. (this is how i like to start a vacation. . . no rushing) i got in around 9pm and watched a couple of episodes of alias. i got up to watch the sunrise. i walked about 5 to 6 miles of the rim trail. i got sleepy, so i went back to my room and took a nap. then i went back, wandered around while watching the sunset. . . it was a little clouded over, so not as exciting. i read a little, watched some lame tv, and had a restless night. i had hoped for flying dreams of the canyon. . . but instead had a stressful dream about work (an ongoing email correspondence between my summer boss and i that will determine whether i go back to electrics or not this summer.) this morning i got up late, and didn’t go walking around the canyon until noonish. i got back out to the watchtower, which was no where near i remember it being. i drove out of the park to watch the IMAX movie about the canyon this afternoon, and then came back to watch the sunset again. no clouds, much better. my hotel neighbors were engrossed in the superbowl as i returned. i’ve eaten mostly yogurt, string cheese, popcorn, cashews, bananas, and some cookies- things out of my cooler. and i’ve had my period the entire weekend- whoop-dee-dooo! if i get out early enough tomorrow, i want to drive through the painted desert, and maybe get out to the meteor crater. it had occurred to me that i could call this trip, ‘my big hole tour.’ :)

see. . . nothing exceptional, no epiphanies. . . maybe a little perspective and inner quietness.

nearly everyone i know in theatre goes through this roller coaster every few months. . . as they assess if they are doing something thats ‘worth it.’ the job demands a lot of your time, your physical strength, your stamina, your emotions. . . and sometimes you wonder, is it worth all the -no pun intended- ‘drama?’ what i come back to is that this job that i do isn’t hurting anyone- as far as i’m aware. i can even see where someone might argue that we are being helpful- in that art can be therapeutic, uplifting, and even educational. . . but i won’t argue that just now. there are times when i really, really, really love it. . . now just isn’t one of those times. i guess i lack focus.

it’s interesting. i have a religious friend, also in theatre. she’s moving cross country and taking a job with another theatre shortly. she was concerned about the move and for her, it finally came down to,’ -this is what god wants of me. he must have a plan, therefore, it will work out.’

i don’t have that clarity, or luxury. i like to think i ‘go with the flow’. . . the wu wei philosophy. but in truth, i make the decisions, the moves, and even the anti-moves. . . which have their own results. i can’t blame or thank anyone but me in the end. no footprints, no sand, no trite story. . . HA!, REM’s ‘losing my religion’ just came into play on my running playlist! that’s rich. so, with no solid beliefs or church to turn to. . . i’m here, at grand canyon. there’s a quote that i’m going to mess up severely, something about ‘i am home to thousands of cathedrals’.

how’s that other saying go? hope for the best, expect the worst. (-that’s about the best thing i learned from the SAT’s)

so i came expecting nothing, but hoping for some perspective. don’t know if i found it yet. i’m envious of people who trip across life epiphanies like cracks in the sidewalk. . . hard to miss. i guess my style is a little more like glow in the dark stars. they are charged and glowing, but you don’t notice till the sun goes down. . . ahhh. . . too many metaphors! moving on. . .

what have i had? lots of music. what is it that people alone carry with them while walking around the rim of the grand canyon? their ipod. that’s right. . . and i saw the rather distinguishing earpieces all over the place. my walk on the rim trail was spent creating a ‘grand canyon’ playlist. i’d pick a handful of songs. . . test them out while i walked, then add to them while taking in a view. sure, i could’ve filled it with bach, mozart, john williams, and- isn’t there a grand canyon suite? but no. . . it’s mostly ‘contemporary’ stuff. a little on the cheesy, mellow side. . . but not a bad mix.

and what’s left? i’m hoping for a decent night’s sleep. tomorrow, i’d like to pack a leave without rushing, but not run late. i’d like to sit and view the canyon while sipping some tea. . . and then i hope to stop at the crater and the painted desert before getting home to do laundry and such before work on tuesday.

sorry ‘bout the randomness. blame it on the canyon.

addendum. . .

at home and must get to sleep. but, i did sip tea while sitting at the rim. i did stop at meteor crater. i drove through the painted desert/ petrified forest park. i turned 30.

getting your goat

this past week i walked into the middle of a conversation among two of my friends. they had been talking about people they work with and the stress of the summer, and how people can lose their tempers. the main topic though, was about how certain people enjoy aggravating other people and in essence. . . they enjoy ‘getting people’s goats.’

they talked about how certain people are particularly good at getting each of their goats. they gave examples and such, they turned to me and one said that they had seen me angry, but they thought it would be pretty tough to get my goat.

however, after having listened to this conversation for a while, i’d had sort of lost the actual meaning of the phrase. i understood it to mean- annoy someone, but i wanted to also understand what they thought it meant. . .and it seemed like, to them, it also included a pretty good temper tantrum.

i’ve worked for people who have lost their temper. as i see it, there is usually an annoyance that builds up, and the actual temper tantrum is over a detail that isn’t the end of the world, but gets blown out of proportion. i remember losing my temper at basketball camp once. my friend/ roommate had done just one too many things to upset me and i blew up at her, then stormed off. . . in the cafeteria. when it comes to childhood/ teenagers and temper tantrums, there’s no better place then the cafeteria- and ‘storming off’ is imperative. i don’t remember what it was all about, i don’t remember what i said, or what i was angry over. . . but i do remember feeling stupid afterwards. i’m pretty sure i haven’t lost my temper, at least in public, since. yes, i get angry, and very very upset, and i’ve even left a room in order to not blow up or say damaging things. . . but i’m pretty sure that i generally keep my cool. guess i’ll hear from anyone if they feel otherwise. . . anyway. . . i do view other people’s tantrums in a rather darkly comedic sense. maybe not at first, and when their anger is directed at me. . . but with some time, it’s just kind of funny.

one of my mentors/ professors lost her temper regularly around me and the other students. when her anger was at another student in the room, it was just a really uncomfortable situation. . . and when her anger was directed at you directly, it was kind of scary. we had finished an evening of tech, and back in the scene shop i was giving notes to my crew when she loudly approached me. she was wild eyed, yelling, and tugging on her hair. she would approach, yell. . . retreat a bit, and then come straight at me again, saying over and over something about a ‘faculty note’ and when one is given i needed to take it. i had no idea what she was talking about. i was stunned and said nothing. when she finally walked off in a huff, i turned to my crew, finished giving my notes to them and excused them for the night. i might have apologized for the situation since i remember them all looking like ‘dad had just slapped mom across the dinner table.’ i then walked into the electrics storage room, kicked a couple of shelves, cried, and called my parents. as it turns out, she was upset about a note that i was never given. in the end, i had written a letter- since i don’t speak well when i’m upset. . . asking her what it was all about and apologizing that she felt i was undermining her authority and the integrity of the show, when in reality i was working my ass off. we sat in her office and discussed it. she apologized and explained that it had been a miscommunication between her and another staff member. i always thought it would’ve been nicer for her to have apologized to me in front of my crew, since she seemed it was necessary to wrongly berate me in front of them. but we don’t always get what we want. . .

(does that mean she got her own goat?)

on another occasion, this time in undergrad. . . i was working with a designer as his painter. we’d both put some long hours into his show. we were arriving at the scene shop to continue painting the set. the entire ride over he was talking about this color he had mixed earlier. it had taken him hours to mix this ‘perfect blue’ for one area of the set. he seemed really proud, and i had built up in my mind that this blue must be just spectacular. he then made a comment about being worried that the paint class kids might think it was there to use and may have tampered with it. we walked in and started to prepare. he pulled out all the cans he had set aside and then had trouble finding his blue. he got more and more angry, and the exploded when he found the can mixed in - not with the show colors- but with the class colors. he had made a full can of the color, and there was only about 2 inches left at the bottom of the can. he really lost it. he started tearing through the canvases that the classes were working on, in search of the people who had used it. he was yelling, cursing up a storm, and then canvases, paint can lids, and paint cans started ricocheting off the cement block walls. i picked up the paint can that only had a little left. i took a close look at a sample of it and then started mixing colors. (i’m actually kinda good at mixing colors, or at least i always thought i was) i figured out the mixture and then made a whole new batch. the designer was still busy searching and raving. about ten minutes in i brought his can and my can over to him for his approval. . . this impossible mixture that had taken him hours, took me minutes, minutes that he wasted making a mess and being noisy. my paint was a perfect match according to his design eye, and we were able to pick up where we left off.

either way, i don’t get the reaction. or at least, i don’t seem to share the need to explode in such a way. i tend to deal in sarcasm, glares, and silence. . . probably not any less childish. . . but less silly looking. . . and less to mock or mimic behind closed doors later.

anyway, back to the goats.

after listening to their stories, i had kind of lost the meaning of, ‘get your goat.’ this became a fun place to be since each time they said it, and they said it A LOT, i envisioned each person having an actual goat, and someone else just taking it.

“ah man, that time he really got my goat.”

“i know how to get your goat, i’m pretty good at it.”

“i wish she didn’t get my goat so often.”

i just started laughing, and then had to explain. . . then i thought, in the spirit of schadenfreude (taking pleasure in some one else’s pain- or in this case, anger. . . thank you dr. john coffee. . . and avenue q) wouldn’t it be fantastic if we each carried a few tiny plastic goats, like charms. and each time someone really upset you, instead of blowing up, you just kind of shook it off, laughed to yourself, and then handed that person one of the goats. the idea kind of grew from that into a contest where whomever had the most goats by then end of the summer would be the winner! of being a dick! and having talent in goat getting.

since i had temporarily lost the meaning and we had discussed it, i then needed to find out the etymology. what is with this ‘goat getting.’

so, of course i googled it. (i also have a book that deals with such things, but the reason in the book is the same reason that is denied on some website. . . so here you go)

: : I know "get your goat" means to annoy someone, but does anyone know the derivation of this phrase?
: There is one theory, espoused by H.L. Mencken among others, that ties the phrase to the world of horse racing. It used to be common practice, goes this theory, to stable goats with race horses, trainers believing that the mere presence of the goats would help keep the excitable thoroughbreds calm. If an unscrupulous gambler were to arrange for the removal of a certain goat from a certain horse's stall the day before a race, the horse might be so flustered by the absence of its hircine pal that it would lose the race. The gambler would thus have "gotten the horse's goat."
: Unfortunately, the first occurrence of the phrase in print, according to the Random House Historical Dictionary of American Slang, was in 1908. Since goats are no longer (if they ever were) housed with race horses, the practice must have arisen near the beginning of the 20th century -- and been abandoned shortly thereafter -- for that theory to be true.
: A more likely origin of the phrase lies in an earlier (1904) citation in the Random House dictionary, for "goat" as prison slang for "anger." I think this may be the key. After all, goats do, with much provocation, get angry. To bring out the "goat" in someone may take some doing, but will eventually have dramatic results.
thanks. . . goat meaning
i think i would take a lot of provocation. and i don’t know where my breaking point is. . . or IF it is. but i’m really into this goat charm idea. . . just sounds like fun. . . and the idea that handing someone a plastic toy goat. . . someone who has been working to ‘get your goat’- but not in such the literal sense. . . may turn the tables on them, and get their goat.

yeah. . . i like that A LOT!

oh but wait! after they receive your goat, and if it does upset them, does that just mean they have to hand the goat back? oh, this could get confusing. . . but still fun!

ok gotta go.

canton movie sign

canton movie sign
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

well. . . i got home for the holidays. and we even had a white christmas. . . which doesn't exist out here in santa fe! though truly, it wasn't as cold as it should've been in ny either.
while toodling around we passed by a local movie theatre that read as followed on the sign.
you know. . . they really should post the reply as well. . . so as not to keep us all in suspense. mom. . . you'll have to let me know if it's posted.

hope everyone had a fantastic holiday and happy new year!

pipe&book

pipe&book
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

while home mom and i made a day trip out of a drive to lake placid. my real intentions. . . were to get to this book store, where one can receive their change in 2 dollar bills. . . . yep. . . my existance is a little lacking in the excitement department. . . but i got a 2 dollar bill. . . and i bet you don't. HA!

dragonshadow

dragonshadow
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

today i was working with a handful of people in the los alamos library/ gallery. we were setting up a showing of props and pictures to kick off our 50th year celebration. suddenly.. . . i noticed a bizarre shadow on the wall. . . . WHAT COULD IT BE?

r2@home

r2@home
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

in other news today. r2 made it to santa fe safely, and was spending time checking out the pad, ant traps and all. . . for those of you unfamiliar, my parents got me this moving, talking, responding r2 unit for christmas. . . it was an amazing surprise. and well, finally gave me something i though i have always deserved. . . a sidekick.

i think he'll be coming to work for a couple of days. . . separation anxiety and all. . .

dragon&me

dragon&me
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

why. . . it's me, in a turandot headpiece. this particular piece was worn by the emperor. . . as his crown i guess. . . but it's freaking cool looking. you kinda want it to operate like a puppet. and it kinda reminds me of mooshu. . . or however you spell it. . . the dragon from mulan.

holiday party

yet again, i’m behind in the writing thing. . . i would like to say that a week on vacation back home would bring some progress, but i think i’ve noticed that that is definitely not the case.

anyway. . . it was in the high 50’s today in santa fe. people were walking around in shorts (including me. . .but that should be no surprise) and tank tops. i did a few errands, including a car wash during which i locked my keys in my car. . . luckily, the cell was in my pocket, so as i continued to clean my car. . . i got a locksmith to visit me. that should be the end of stupid things for a week right? HA. . . doubt it.

after such a warm week, ----what, ----what was that? global warming. . . what ARE you talking about? i’m betting that ottawa and northern ny will be quite the shock to my system. . . must remember to pack all those layers!

so yeah. . .where was i? oh right, holiday party. . . last thursday. jared was the main proponent, but katy and i were absolutely willing to add in once we were out of work. jared had actually set up a complete buffet. turkey, ham, peas, corn, stuffing etc. . . including the buffet servers to keep everything warm. i added some carnivore smores and faux grilled pineapple. . . and the normal rumballs. it was a slow start. . . but pretty quickly, we had a rip roaring party on our hands. . . . there were a handful of opera people that came and went the entire evening, which meant i actually had people to talk to. . . yippeee. jared’s coworkers from borders showed up in droves and occupied the living-room, which i mostly avoided. i think the most i interacted was by teaching some guy how to make a midori sour.

along with one of our coworkers, randy, from the opera came a gift, actually a couple of gifts. as jared opened one present randy leaned over to me and warned me that i would hate it. being that i’m not exactly a ‘festive’ holiday person, when i saw a penguin revealed, i quickly asked, ‘does it sing?’ and then a second quick shot, ‘does it move?’ the answer to both was yes. it’s a singing, hopping penguin. granted, i own a cereal bowl that is shaped to look like R2D2 and it makes R2D2 noises. . . but come on. . . it’s R2D2! this is a christmas song singing hop hop hoppity-ing holiday penguin. along with my mom’s festive cactus that sings ‘feliz navidad’. . . it’s one more thing that is ‘magically turned off’ when i walk through the room. randy’s second gift takes the prize however. after seeing both of them, and randy knowing how little i like the holidays, i turned to him a jokingly stated that he has managed to bring the two worst presents ever. randy walked in with a mounted deer head. it was festively costumed with a red bow about it’s neck, and red christmas tree ornaments affixed to each of it’s antlers.

i am not a person without humor. . . in fact, i often find humor where others find it inappropriate- as well as in all the ‘right’ places. the dark humor in a dead animal’s head mounted and decorated festively is not totally wasted on me. . . however, taking that dark joke and then affixing it to a structural entity of our house, kills the joke- for me. sometime in the middle of the party, randy and jared procured tools. holes were drilled. . . they took turns stepping back to make sure it was centered. and the head was placed over our fireplace. shortly after. . . people were taking pictures with it as a backdrop. there was supposed to be a ‘roommate’ picture. jared, katy and i were to gather under a gaily attired stuffed dead deer head for a holiday picture. someone grabbed hold of my arm to push me into the shot. i stood firmly and soberly (which wasn’t too easy) stated that i was morally opposed. i think i might have meant, ‘morbidly opposed.’

I HAVE A FUCKING DECORATED DEAD DEER HEAD HANGING ON MY WALL!

it stares at me as i watch tv, while i enter through the front door, as i water my plants. it’s eyes plead with me. ‘look at me,’ it seems to say, ‘i’ve been killed, stuffed, mounted, and now festively decorated. for the love of god, put me out of my misery!’

i wanted to start that first evening. . maybe stick a cigarette in it’s mouth. . . with a quote bubble saying, ‘cancer kills.’ one problem. . . i don’t smoke and won’t buy cigarettes out of spite. perhaps i would draw maori type tattoos on it’s fur. but no, it’s actually a prop from the opera and can’t be permanently tampered with.

but. . . do you think i’m able to leave ‘well enough’ alone. HELL NO!

you’ll have to scroll down for pictures to see what i did. . . .

ps. happy holidays. .. safe travels.

deerapplique

deerapplique
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

i ask you, the gentle reader, how much 'spike' needs to be added to a holiday party in order for it to be pushed to such extremes. . . that someone decides, 'hey, lets take a sad, festively decorated dead deer head and position it on a structural entity of our home.'

certainly, i was not downing enough holiady spirits.

deerhead

deerhead
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

OH THE HORROR! there's a FUCKING FESTIVE DEAD DEER HEAD on the livingroom wall. . . positioned 'just so' over the fireplace. HEEEEEELLLLLLLLPPPPPPPP MEEEEEEEEEE!

stonerdeer

stonerdeer
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

my revenge. . . while everyone was gone, i tried to relieve the pain of this poor deer's existance, with some 'medicinal' help. HA!

"the one that got stuck?"

i had intended on starting this blog with, “well, here it is, december 13 and we still have no snow. . . except for the snow i didn’t get to see while i was away on thanksgiving.”

i can’t really start that way today though. . . i woke up and noticed that there was a couple of fluffy inches on the ground.

whoo hoo

so, first off. . . .got home LATE last night, or late for me, since i’m usually asleep by 11 at the latest during the winter season. . . and we got in from a concert around 12:30. . . asleep around 1am. . . ouch.

what concert you ask. . . the Brian Setzer Orchestra Christmas Spectacular! it was soooooooo SPECTACULAR! he is such an amazing musician, and his band ROCKS. . . especially the trumpet section. . . my favorites. i even enjoyed the christmas music, which really rocked as well. one of the final pieces was a swinging rocked out version of the nutcracker suite. . . i thought i’d never like that music again. . . . ahhhh. . . . brian setzer, another hero to add to the list. dad, i think you would love this show.

so, yes, i overslept my alarm a bit, but i had to make it in for a designer presentation at 8am. so i was out the door by 7:30. there was the snow, and the not so well plowed roads. i hit the useless round-about before the main road which set me fishtailing. the fishtailing got worse. i corrected, and calmly i heard my dad’s voice, ‘keep the front of the car in the front.’ i kept correcting, actually over correcting. about three major fishtails, and there i was in a 360. (before i get further, mom, i’m fine) the road was completely clear, lucky for me, lucky for anyone else. after stopping, i took a deep breath and turned back onto the road to head to work.

then, there was opera drive.

the opera drive that i was able to make it up last year when no one else could. i was within 100 yards of the gate. . . the last rough hill and curve. and my tires slipped. so, i was stuck. (again, mom. . . fine) i called my coworkers and they sent out reinforcements. before that though, there were three other people stuck on the same hill. the situation was complicated. . . people were pulling out shovels and trying to sand the road.

anyway. . . . a half hour later i was in the opera. and we were able to start the designer presentation, a half hour late.

later that day i attempted to make up for it by doing a decent amount of the grilling for lunch. carnivore smores and burgers. mmmmmm. while grilling (in the snow) i stepped onto a piece of slick scenery buried in the snow and fell directly on my ass, in the puddle being made by the melting snow from overhead. . . did i mention i had been slicing cheese with a hatchet and was holding the hatchet as i fell?

today kind of felt like i needed a do over.

again, i was fine, but rather wet and cold. we set up for lunch with the crew and designer. this particular designer, paul brown, is really fantastic. his costume renderings are really gorgeous, and the scenery designs are beautiful and innovative. and on top of it all, he seems to be a really nice guy. when he was here last, i remembered wishing i had the chance to listen to his talk backs and ask him questions, but we were too busy. i figured with the day i had been having so far, there was no chance of me partaking in sparkling conversation.

while grilling, paul brown came over to see if i needed any help, and then asked, ‘aren’t you the one that got stuck?’ yes, i will forever be immortalized in this world renowned designer’s memory as the girl that held up his presentation while getting my car stuck. fantastic. ugh. . .

a group of us continued to chat during lunch, sharing some fun snowy car stories. paul asked where i was originally from, and when he found out that i was from northern ny, he gave me a hard time about not having any excuse for driving poorly in the snowy weather. he had a point. i’m a disappointment to my upbringing. christ!. . . the first time i drove ever was on black ice! arg.

so that was my day. how was yours?

mmmmm. . . michael wincott

it’s been a week now, since this happened, but we had the christmas party to set up this week, the espanola light parade was last night, la posadas was tonight- but i opted to not go. . . and a brian setzer christmas spectacular concert tomorrow night. . . little busy. . .

ANYWAY. . . last week i went to do some shopping at the borders. i was walking through the cd area and i heard this voice. . . this incredibly recognizable voice. i looked up and saw this guy, in a dark skull cap and a dark sweater with white punk-ish writing all over it. i couldn’t tell for sure, so i listened for his voice again and possibly a glimpse of his face. he looked right up at me- of course i quickly looked away in the hopes that i wouldn’t be seen staring. although he was scruffy, it was completely apparent. it was him, but fuck, i forgot his name! being that i was right next to the dvd area, i walked over to pick up a copy of ‘basquiat,’ knowing that i would recognize his name instantly. and there is was, simple, michael wincott. . . and there HE was, looking through the live concert dvds. there were a number of people shopping with him. i did hear one of them on their phone say that they had just gotten into santa fe, and that they were in the borders, because, what else were they going to do.

i only had two things to look for, and i found them immediately. but. . . i decided to waste some time and bask in the coolness that is michael wincott. . .. (ps, for the uninitiated. . . . michael wincott played the main bad guy in ‘the crow’. . . and another bad guy in ‘strangedays’. . . and he had a great part in ‘basquiat’. . . . he has a really gruff voice, which is probably why he cast as really good bad guys pretty often.)

so there i was, listening to almost any interesting music on the different stations around the store, in the hopes of catching a bit of conversation or something. after about a half hour of this, i realized that one of the other people with him was one of the kids from ‘lords of dogstown’. . . which i haven’t seen yet, but i’d seen the skateboard documentary that it was based on, ‘dogtown and z-boys’. . .

wincott spent a lot of time pouring over the cd’s. at one point his basket was right next to me. . . he had quite the collection stacked. i said nothing. . . tried to not give away that i knew him, when in my mind i wanted to grab a copy of the crow, maybe have him sign it? or just hold it up with a thumbs up from me while dancing across an aisle in front of him. instead. . . i debated over the new franz ferdinand, or the new beck.

long story short. . . i played it cool. what could i say anyway, that wouldn’t be totally lame and pest-like. . . . i walked out with the beck, which will now be always known as ‘the beck cd i bought while shopping next to michael wincott.’ i IMDB-ed it later, turned out he, and a number of other people are in the area shooting a civil war movie.

well. . . that’s it. . . for now. . .

aeonlook

aeonlook
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

before driving to phoenix, i needed a hair cut, and i was SO sick of the length, that i told her to take it to my jaw. yep, a little shorter than i'm comfortable with, but oh well, it will grow. and well, after the stylist got to it, i kinda felt like i was unintentionally ready for the opening of aeon flux.

thanksgiving

thanksgiving
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

the thanksgiving splay included, carrots, asparagus, chestnut stuffing, cranberry sauce, garlic/ green chile mashed potatoes, rolls, candied yams, mashed sweet potatoes, and, of course, the turkey. obviously, not everything is on the table yet.

matt&me

matt&me
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

we stepped out for breakfast and some non-thanksgiving food.

trevor&matt

trevor&matt
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

yes, here are matt and trevor, the day after thanksgiving. . . walking around in sunny and warm tempe. . . and yes, it was warm enough out to have some ice cream.

trevor&me

trevor&me
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

nice shot, except my eyes are closed. . . bleh

matt&view

matt&view
Originally uploaded by ekissam.

we drove around for a while checking out the scenery.